A Wicked Christmas Surprise
Scene Five - Something Bad

After the laughter of Nilaya and Brushy's duet had subsided, the scene opened to a classroom.  Students - Galinda and Elphaba included - milled around on benches.  Finally, Nanuq swept in, to applause and cheers from the audience.  Really, his costume was quite good.  Just enough makeup and prosthetic to suggest a goat, with horns curling from a curly white wig, and full professor robes.

“Settle down, now!”  He said regally.  “I have read your most recent essays.  And I am amazed to report the progress!  Although, some of us,” and here he bestowed quite a Look on Nilaya “still tend to favor for over content…Miss Glinda.”

Nilaya bristled.  “It's GAlinda.”

“Excuse me,” he apologized, and made quite a bit of show in trying to pronounce it.  “Glinda.”

She glared.  “I really don't see what the problem is.  Every other professor seems to be able to pronounce my name.”

“Maybe pronouncing your precious name isn't the sole purpose of Doctor Dillamond's life,” Brushy said scathingly.  “Maybe he's not like every other professor.  Maybe some of us are different.”

“Oh!” Nilaya giggled behind her hand.  “It seems the artichoke is steamed.”

“Class, class!” Nanuq said, waving his arms.  “Miss Elphaba has a point!  As you know, I am the sole Animal on the on the faculty.  The token Goat, as it were.  But it wasn't always this way.  Oh, dear students, how I wish you could have seen it as it once was.  Where you could walk down the halls and see an antelope explicating a sonnet, a snow leopard solving an equation, a wildebeest waxing philosophic.  Don't you see, dear, students, how our dear Oz is become less…” He spared a glance at Brushy.  “…colorful.  Now, who can tell me what sent these events into motion.”

Brushy raised her hand.  “From what I've heard, it all started with the great drought.”

“Exactly,” Nanuq nodded, and the white hair bounced against the horns.  “Food grew scarce, people grew hungrier and angrier.  And the question became ‘Whom can we blame?’  Can anyone tell me what is meant by the term ‘Scapegoat’?”  He sighed as Brushy raised her hand.  “Someone besides Miss Elphaba?  Ah yes, Miss Glinda…”

“It's GAlinda…with a guh!” Nilaya snapped.  “I don't see why you can't just teach us history instead of always harping on the past.”

Nanuq shook his head.  “Well, perhaps these questions will enlighten you…” he strode over to the chalk board and flipped it over.  On the back, in big red letters over the neat questions written in white, it said ‘ANIMALS SHOULD BE SEEN AND NOT HEARD’.  All motion in class stopped.  “Who is responsible for this?”  Silence.  “I'm waiting for an answer!”  Still nothing.  “Very well, that will be all for today…you heard me, class DISMISSED!”

The students scrambled off the stage as Nanuq turned to the chalkboard and tried to get the red letters off.  Soon all that was left were Brushy and Chrissie.

“You go on ahead, Nessa,” Brushy said softly.

Chrissie nodded and wheeled herself out.

“Animals should be seen and not heard…” Brushy said in disgust.

Nanuq finally noticed her.  “Oh, Miss Elphaba, don't worry about me, go along and enjoy your friends.”

Brushy walked over to the bench and sat down.  “Oh, that's alright, I have no friends.  Would you like to share my lunch?”

“Oh thank you,” he replied, taking a seat.  “How kind.”

She pulled a candy bar out of the bag and unwrapped it.  He took the paper and began to munch on it.  They had to wait until the laughter died down to continue.  They both looked at the chalkboard for a second before he replaced the wrapper.

“I seem to have lost my appetite,” he said finally.

“You shouldn't let statements like that bother you.  I mean, I always do, but you shouldn't.”

Nanuq shook his head.  “Oh Miss Elphaba, if it were only a matter of words on a chalkboard.  But the things one hears these days…dreadful things!  Miss Elphaba…”

He began to sing in his deep baritone, to applause.

“I've heard of an ox, a professor from Quox
No longer permitted to teach
Who has lost all powers of speech
And an owl in Munchkin Rock
A vicar with a thriving flock
Forbidden to preach
Now he only can screech!
Only rumors, but still, enough to give pause
To anyone with paws…
Something bad…is happening in Oz.”

Brushy moved to sit on the same bench.  “Something bad?  Happening in Oz?”

Nanuq nodded.  “Under the surface, behind the scenes, something BAAAAAH…” a long goat baa escaped and they both paused.  “Sorry, bad…”

Brushy frowned.  “Dr. Dillamond, are you alright?  Shall I fetch you a glass of water?

“No, I don't know what came over me,” he assured her.

“So, you're saying that there are animals that have, somehow, forgotten how to speak?  But, how is that possible?”

He shrugs.  “Well, with so much pressure not to…”

They both stop as April comes flouncing onto the stage.  “I heard there was some sort of disturbance in class.  Are you alright, Doctor?  Oh, Miss Elphaba, you're still here!  I thought you would have been on your way to my seminar by now.”

Brushy stood guiltily.  “Yes Madame, ordinarily I would be but…”

“But what?” April demanded.  “I do hope I have not misplaced my trust in you.  Magic is a very demanderating mistress, and if one has ambitions of meeting the Wizard.  I'm sure Doctor Dillamond sees my point.”

She exited with a twitch of her gaudy skirts.  Brushy stared after her, still guilty.  “I'd better go, Doctor Dillamond, if something bad is happening to the Animals then someone has to tell the Wizard.  That's why we have a Wizard!  So nothing bad…”

“Nothing all that bad.”

“Nothing truly baaaaaahhh… Sorry, bad.”

Brushy frowned.  “It couldn't happen here, in Oz…”

The lights went down.